


If you want to keep things friendly...

by Sadisticsparkle (sadisticsparkle)



Category: Marvel 616
Genre: Advanced Idea Mechanics, Adventure & Romance, Avengers Vol. 3 (1998), Best Friends, Birds, Blow Jobs, Captain America/Iron Man Reverse Big Bang 2019, Crack Treated Seriously, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Hand Jobs, Humor, M/M, POV Steve Rogers, Parrots, Puns & Word Play
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-27
Updated: 2019-05-27
Packaged: 2020-03-20 12:12:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,942
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18992431
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sadisticsparkle/pseuds/Sadisticsparkle
Summary: When the Avengers get a tip about an abandoned warehouse in Jersey where screams and ‘inhuman cackling’ are heard at night, Tony and Steve go investigate without knowing that what they find there will make them finally stop dancing around their feelings and deal with it.





	If you want to keep things friendly...

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Art for 'If you want to keep things friendly... '](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18985834) by [ranoutofrun](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ranoutofrun/pseuds/ranoutofrun). 



> Oh, well, wasn't this hard! But it's done and posted!
> 
> I'm super happy to have written this story inspired by ranoutofrun's gorgeous art which is here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18985834
> 
> I hope you like this!

The tip was straightforward enough. A warehouse in Jersey that had been abandoned for some time but that was seeing new, increased activities and security guards in nearby warehouses were terrified of the screams and ‘inhuman cackling’ they heard at night. The Police weren’t that keen on investigating - you never knew whether it’d be kids pulling a prank, normal criminals or some dangerous bozo in garish clothes. Better to quietly send the information the Avengers’ way and let them handle it.

Deep down, Steve wasn’t sure there was much to it but in times of uncertainty, investigating weird shenanigans was comforting. He knew what to do, he knew what worked and he wasn’t afraid of doing it, which stood in stark contrast to how he felt about his own personal life and other people.

Steve looked over at the driver of his car and smiled. The best part was that Tony had said ‘yes’. They would have fun together, solving some simple case. He could have invited the rest but… it didn’t warrant it and, if he was honest, the team needed time apart. Time to calm down. With Tony, at least, things were working well enough that they could spend the ride in the cozy silence of two people who can guess what the other is thinking and have long-established rules about who picks the music.

When they reached the warehouse, Steve held back a sigh - it didn’t look like there was a lot going on. A grimy exterior, a dim lamp hanging above the door, no cars parked in front of it, no signs of life inside. There were no inhuman cackles or shrieking. It was quiet. Some people would say he was paranoid but Steve had learned to mistrust quiet, nothing good ever came from it.

‘This looks like a bust, but let’s check it out,’ Tony said when the car stopped. Steve nodded and grabbed the shield from the backseat before stepping down from the car. He spared the car a glance before walking towards the warehouse - it was expensive and sleek, like most things Tony. Standing next to it, Tony looked like he was in some TV commercial. He looked even more expensive and sleek than the car, with his tousled hair and his chiseled profile.

Steve walked up to the warehouse while Tony put on the armor. As expected, the warehouse door was locked. Without missing a beat, he started pushing it open, groaning and straining his muscles. He pretended not to be pleased when Tony made an appreciative noise. The door slammed the wall with a loud clang and then the warehouse went from dead silent to deafening.

In the midst of the hellish cacophony, he could pick up familiar catchphrases - _it’s clobbering time!_ _Sweet Christmas!_ \- drowned by jingles from old commercials and broken, raspy shrieks. He covered his ears and took a deep breath before stepping into the place. This was probably what the security guards were hearing at night. What - or who - were they keeping there? And for what reason?

The answer was less fantastical than usual, for an Avengers situation. Inside the gray interior of the warehouse, there were a dozen neat rows of cages, all filled with fluttery balls of feathers ranging the entire chromatic circle. He chuckled. The bounty, apparently, was parrots. If the cops had bothered to check it out, they’d have seen it was simply an animal trafficking operation and at least, the parrots didn’t look hurt. They could track down the traffickers and shut them down.

Steve walked toward one of the cages and put his finger between the bars of one of the cages. All he got for his trouble was a bite from the lime resident of the cage.

He bit back a yelp and a pout. Stupid birds.

‘You should’ve brought Sam for this, not me.’

And of course Tony had seen it. There went his dignity.

‘Sam wouldn’t be as good of a date,’ he said. He sounded more sullen than he hoped, but at least he had said it. Tony would probably dismiss it as a joke, the way they both deflected any attempts at naming whatever it was between them, but before Tony could say anything, Steve spotted a bright splash of yellow in the back of the warehouse.

‘AIM,’ he muttered.

‘Oh. Now we need to be worried. The parrots are probably radioactive.’

‘It’s just AIM.’

‘Then do the honors, Captain America, if it’s so easy.’

Steve grinned, took a deep breath and leaped over two rows of cages, landing neatly behind the guards and knocked them out with one simple knock to their heads.

‘See? I told you, just AIM.’

‘You missed one,’ Tony shouted, already flying above him.

Steve looked in the direction Iron Man was going and saw a third yellow figure, almost hidden between the myriad of bright colors in the cages. It was running quickly towards the back of the warehouse. Without even having to look at each other, he and Iron Man ran after him. It was always exhilarating to be on the same page with somebody.

They were almost too slow - the AIM henchperson was already climbing up a ladder towards the roof, carrying a metal box with him. Steve could hear the unmistakable sound of a helicopter above them, but he knew it was too far away from either of them so they wouldn’t be able to stop the scientist from escaping. Making a quick decision, Steve threw his shield at the AIM scientist’s hand. The man screamed and let go of the box. Steve wasn’t worried - Tony would catch it. And Iron Man did catch it with a flourish before landing next to Steve.

Tony put the box on a table and opened it. There was a blue parrot inside it. It tilted its head and then proudly announced ‘Shellhead!’.

They both stared at the parrot in disbelief. It replied in kind, tilting its head at them.

‘Is he… talking to me?’ Tony said.

‘Probably repeating something he heard,’ Steve answered. ‘They were repeating… catchphrases when we got here, remember?’

The birds had calmed down somewhat and while they were still noisy, it wasn’t the screaming symphony it had been at first. They could talk now, normally.

‘Maybe AIM was training them.’

‘For what? Annoying us?’

Tony shrugged. ‘You never know with AIM. They might have weaponized annoyance.’

‘Isn’t that what AIM has been doing all along?’

Tony snorted. They both took a closer look at the bird that was now silent. It was a stunning cobalt blue, with bright yellow accents. Very striking in the jungle, very out of a place in a gray warehouse with harsh fluorescent light. Steve imagined it cutting across the sky, surrounded by the saturated colors of tropical flowers and the luscious green of jungle trees. Yes, that fit better. It probably couldn’t wait to be back home.

Tony had moved away a bit and was talking to somebody else over the radio.

‘The police are coming. Do you think…?’ he said after a while.

‘Yes. I think we should take it with us. There’s probably something special about the parrot.’

‘Exactly. So far it seems normal, but there must be a reason this one was the one he was taking with him.’

‘Maybe he’s the nicest of the bunch. Maybe it was his pet.’

‘It’s AIM. They only think of animals like guinea pigs.’

‘Good point. Have you taken…?

‘The computer files? Yep.’

‘Then we’re ready.’

‘And the police can sort out the rest.’

If Steve was honest, the police could have sorted the whole thing. They took the cage and by the time they were out of the warehouse, there was already a patrol car waiting out front. The police officers tipped their hats at them and they nodded. Tony’s car was parked a few blocks away, far enough that people wouldn’t see Tony change out of the armor. When they got to it after going through dark back alleys and empty streets, they put the parrot in the backseat, where it proceeded to pointedly not shut up during the entire ride to the mansion. Steve tried to put some music on, but it just made it worse.

‘I’m sorry,’ Tony said.

‘What are you apologizing for?’

‘Well… I was thinking this could be…’

Steve waited. Was Tony going to say date? He really hoped Tony would.

‘Nomad!’ the parrot said then.

Tony laughed. ‘Look, Steve, it’s recognized you!’

‘He’s… he’s probably just saying stuff.’

Tony shook his head.

‘Don’t be embarrassed. Nomad was the best.’

‘Uh, really?’

‘Yep. My favorite costume of yours. You should bring it back.’

Steve chuckled, embarrassed, but decided not to inquire further. People got weird about the Nomad costume.

When they got to the Mansion, Steve followed Tony into the workshop and sat down while Tony put the parrot on top of one of the workshop benches and stared at it intently.

‘It’s not gonna tell you what it knows, Tony.’

‘Parrots are supposed to be very intelligent. Maybe it will.’

‘Even if it doesn’t, you’ll figure it out,’ Steve said, putting his hand on Tony’s shoulder. Tony instantly relaxed.

‘I hope so. I don’t think we’ve seen the last of this.’

‘No, we haven’t. But I know you have this.’

Tony turned around and put his hand on top of Steve’s. ‘Thanks. You don’t know how much this means to me.’

Steve smiled at him. ‘I believe in you.’

He leaned in and then the parrot screamed _Flame on!_. He sighed.

‘I’ll leave you to your work,’ he said and hoped the disappointment in Tony’s eyes wasn’t only in his imagination.

 

 

Steve waited a few days before going back to the workshop. He hadn’t seen Tony much lately and he didn’t want it to be awkward. He knew that something had almost happened, but he didn’t want to push Tony. If he did, Tony would get scared and run away. Steve had a tendency towards coming on too strong and he didn’t want to ruin it, not this, not when their friendship could be at risk.

Tony was sitting in front of his computer, wearing comfortable clothes and sipping coffee. On the screen, Steve could see images of parrots and diagrams and a lot of words. Tony’s shoulders were tight and from the looks of it, he hadn’t left the workshop in a while. He walked towards where Tony was sitting, looking around the workshop as he did. Things were normal, except there was a big bird cage in the middle of the workshop with food and water inside it. The bird, however, was nowhere to be seen.

Tony turned to Steve without standing up from his chair.

‘Hey, Steve.’

‘I came down to… wanna spar for a bit? Get the blood pumping?’

‘You’ve got to be kidding!’, the parrot said from somewhere in the workshop.

Steve raised an eyebrow at Tony. Tony waved his hand.

‘He’s been saying that all day, don’t mind it.’

‘You haven’t answered.’

‘I wish I could, you know how much I enjoy the… sparring, but I’m very tired. Sorry, Steve.’

It didn’t seem like the truth - it sounded like an excuse. Tony had even grimaced as if something about the idea was distasteful. He had never reacted like that to sparring.

‘Lies!’ added the parrot helpfully. If Steve got his hands on it, he’d… stare at it very angrily until the parrot felt very sorry for its rudeness.

‘Then what about eating something? Early dinner and then you can rest?’

‘I can’t rest. Not yet. I’m looking through the data we got from the AIM facility and nothing makes sense.’

‘Excuses!’

Tony stood up from the chair finally and stomped towards the back of the workshop. Steve finally saw the parrot perched atop a bunch of cardboard boxes, surveying its land.

‘You stop it now, Nomad!’ Tony said, waving his finger at it.

Steve jolted.

‘Wait, what did you call it?’

Tony turned around, embarrassed.

‘Uh. It’s the… color scheme. Reminded me of that costume. Does it bother you?’

He shook his head. ‘I don’t mind it, but you won’t distract me. You need to leave this place for a while. See the sun. Maybe even see some friends.’

Tony smiled at him. It was a bright, happy smile. ‘I don’t need to leave to see the friends, do I?’

‘Oh, so I can stay?’

‘Intruder! Intruder!’

Steve went into a defensive stance instinctively.

Damn bird.

‘He’s not an intruder,’ Tony said with a sigh.

‘I’ll come back with dinner. If the bird lets me.’

‘He will.’

He came down with some Chinese take-out one or two hours later. He sat on one of the benches and watched Tony worked for a while, before distracting him with questions about his new company and about Pepper and Happy. The conversation drifted to the team like it usually did when he and Tony talked.

‘We’re not working together well enough,’ Steve said, staring at the empty bottom of a food container before grabbing another one.

‘Just try to talk to them. Ask them how they’re doing.’

‘That sounds so simple it's probably a trap.’

‘I’ll buy you dinner if you do.’

‘That a promise?’

‘Always…’ Tony said, but then the computer beeped. Tony made a face and sighed.’… but I have to get back to work now.’

Steve sighed, tried not to pout, and left with the trash and Tony’s empty, dirty coffee cups.

 

 

Vance and Crystal were staring at the open fridge, apparently picking breakfast and wasting tons of electricity. Crystal looked tired but when Vance put his arm around her and brought her closer, she seemed to brighten up a little bit.

He wasn’t sure they were ready for the Avengers, but Crystal had potential and Vance only needed to get over himself. They had all been like that at first - eager, full of energy and full of confusion. Trying to prove themselves so much they ended up making mistakes and tripping over their issues. That was why you needed somebody who had your back, who understood you. Like Tony understood him and supported him. He smiled, remembering Tony’s promise and what he had to do if he wanted dinner.

He coughed before entering the kitchen. Vance jumped away from Crystal.

‘Hey, good morning,’ he said, trying to be as normal as possible. ’Is breakfast ready?’

‘Hm. We were planning to but… won’t Jarvis mind if we use his stuff?’

‘We don’t want to be rude,’ Crystal added.

Steve grabbed milk and eggs from the fridge. ‘It’s your stuff. You’re both Avengers, remember?’

They both looked a bit wary, but Crystal got some blueberries.

‘Look, I can cook if you want. Jarvis won’t scream at me. He’s used to it.’

They all three ended up cooking. It had been nice, but Steve thought it would have been even nicer if Tony had been there. He grabbed the dirty dishes, told Crystal and Vance he could handle it and dropped them in the sink. Yes, they had a state-of-the-art dishwasher but Steve thought washing dishes could be relaxing. It let him zone out, ignore the noises and all the stimuli around him… which led to surprises, like suddenly hearing somebody enter the kitchen.

He turned around - maybe Tony had finally left the workshop, but it was just Clint.

‘Oh, I missed breakfast? Why didn’t you tell me?’

‘There was nothing to tell, it wasn’t planned, but I can whip something up for…’

‘It’s okay, Steve,’ Clint said and waved his hand. ‘You don’t need to buy me off.’

‘What? What are you talking about?’

Clint shrugged.

‘You’ve been like this a lot lately. Are you happy on the team or not, Clint?’

‘Sometimes you’re so subtle, Steve.’

‘That didn’t answer my question.’

‘I am happy here but… sometimes you need new things. New challenges. I feel stifled here.’

Steve had never felt that way about the Avengers. Wouldn’t feel that way at all, but sometimes it scared him, the thought of the people that made the team growing bored with it. Leaving Steve and the team behind. He started drying the dishes, turning away from Clint.

‘No matter what you do, you know we support you,’ he said.

When he turned around, Clint was gone.

The… talk with Clint left him buzzing with tension. He didn’t know what to do and Tony was still holed up in the workshop, so he went to do the one thing that always helped clear his mind - train. Nothing too tiring - some warm-up, a few exercises. Something to sweat a bit, get outside of his head. In the middle of a somersault, Vision sprung up from a wall. He landed badly and strained his ankle. Vision hovered near him while he massaged his ankle.

‘Sorry, Captain. I did not notice you were here.’

‘I’m… it’s okay.’

Vision didn’t look entirely normal. Yes, he was a synthezoid, but that didn’t mean Steve couldn’t tell when Vision was upset or worried about something. They had too much history for that.

‘Hey, is everything okay?’

‘You know it’s not, Captain.’

‘Wanda,’ he said.

‘Yes. Things have not… gone back to normal yet.’

‘I’m sorry,’ he said. There was little to say there - they had tried to be happy and failed. Now all that was left were pieces that Vision and Wanda had to learn to live with.

‘So am I.’

He took a shower after Vision left. Maybe he needed some sun, a little bit of air like he had told Tony. He dressed and went to the garden. He wasn’t alone - Wanda was sitting on a bench, lost in thought. She seemed so far away lately, especially after Carol had left. There was little he could do, other than sit next to her and offer her his silent support.

‘You don’t need to spend your afternoon comforting me, Steve.’

‘That’s not what I’m doing. I’m spending time with a friend,’ he said and then she smiled. It wasn’t the bright smile of the past, but it was something.

 

 

It was sunset and his mission was accomplished -Tony had said that if Steve talked to the entire team, he’d pay for dinner and Steve had indeed checked in with the entire team. Steve wasn’t particularly interested in the food, but he wanted to get Tony out of the workshop and that was as good an excuse as any to spend time together.

(And if it looked like a date, well, that was just an added benefit.)

When he entered the workshop, Tony was slumped on his chair looking at the computer screen with a frown. Steve quickly counted thirteen coffee cups and twenty-one half-eaten bagels. Yep, he needed to get Tony out of there for a while, clear his mind and make him relax. He got closer and put his hands on Tony’s shoulders. Tony looked up and Steve felt Tony’s muscles rippling under his hand. Tony had always been deceptively skinny, in a way that hid his lean, wiry, strong body.

‘Hi, Steve,’ Tony said with a smile but he sounded miserable. There were dark circles under his eyes and the beginning of a stubble - which Steve thought looked hot but he wasn’t going to say that.

‘Are you okay?’

Tony sighed and closed his eyes. ‘I still can’t figure it out. At first, all the parrot did was repeat random superhero catchphrases, but now it seems it has a very remarkable memory.’

Steve started massaging Tony’s shoulders, not surprised at how many knots there were. Tony yelped at first, but then he moaned with pleasure.

‘What do you mean?’

‘He… yes, right there… repeats… this is great… everything I… your hands are so big… say.’

Under his hands, Tony was slowly melting into the chair as Steve worked out the tension.

‘Don’t most parrots?’

‘Yes, but I’ve checked with… do that again… a few ornithologists. It’s outside of… of… yes, just like that… normal parameters.’

‘You'll figure it out,’ Steve said and stopped the massage.

Tony opened his eyes and frowned. ‘Why are you stopping? I didn’t tell you to stop.’

‘You want more massages, you need to rest first.’

‘I promise I will.’

‘Not until I see you rested. You need to stop focusing on the parrot. Where is it the parrot, anyway?’

Tony put up his hands. ‘It’s resting. You can’t see it now.’

That was suspicious. The bird was nowhere to be seen and the cage wasn’t even in the workshop anymore. What was the parrot saying that Tony was so eager to hide?

‘Resting like you should be?’

Tony stood up and turned towards Steve, ignoring his question.

‘Are you here to get your dinner then?’ he said, getting closer to Steve. He looked so damn beautiful when he was so close Steve could drink in the details, like the way Tony’s eyelashes curved and the almost invisible laughter lines. He looked down at Tony’s lips and the way Tony was licking them.

‘Hm, yes… but…’

Then Tony yawned and leaned his forehead on Steve’s chest. Steve flushed and put his hands on Tony’s waist. His heart was beating fast.

‘You need a nap,’ he said because he was an idiot.

Tony mumbled something against Steve’s chest.

‘Didn’t hear you.’

Tony looked up to Steve, with half a pout. Steve started closing the distance when he heard a door open.

‘I was saying…’ Tony started to say but then…

 

 

the parrot landed on Tony’s head.

‘Winghead!’

Steve took a step back, startled, and remembered his original objective. ‘Look, I’m exchanging my dinner for a nap.’

Tony was now doing a full pout. His arms were crossed and he looked exactly like a toddler who does not want to have a nap.

‘Sleeping is better than dinner with me?’

‘No, it’s not, but dinner with you now would be very boring. You’d end up sleeping on your pasta. So…’

‘So you won’t be the one sleeping,’ Tony said with a sigh.

‘Yep. If you want to have dinner with me, sleep first.’

‘Fine. But we’ll have dinner tomorrow, okay?’

‘Wouldn’t miss it for anything in the world.’

With another dramatic sigh, Tony let Steve led him upstairs, towards Steve’s bedroom.

‘Your bedroom? That’s forward of you.’

Steve flushed again. ‘Well, if dinner goes well…’

Tony sat down on Steve’s bed and Steve felt the heat inside of him rise. ‘Do you…?’

‘Yes, I mean it. But sleep first.’

‘I’ll dream of you,’ Tony said before drifting off on Steve’s bed.

It was a nice image and a part of him wanted to stay there and watch Tony sleep. But if he was honest, Steve still wanted to know what the parrot was saying. Knowing that Tony was now safely sleeping in Steve’s bed, he decided to infiltrate Tony’s workshop. It wasn’t as difficult as he expected, considering how much security Tony was supposed to have. He’d have to talk to Tony about it - it wouldn’t do if some of Tony’s tech was taken from the Mansion.

The workshop’s lights were turned off, except for one in the middle of it. It shone on the parrot’s blue and yellow plumage and highlighted the mean, conniving look on its face.

‘Hi,’ Steve said, awkwardly and got closer to it.

‘Shellhead!’ the parrot said.

‘I’m not… that’s not me.’

‘Shellhead! Shellhead!’

Wasn’t it supposed to be a super smart parrot? Why was it repeating the same words over and over then?

‘Tony’s here? Are you calling for Tony?’

The parrot tilted its head and stared at Steve. Or at least Steve thought it was staring.

‘Winghead!’ it finally shrieked.

‘Yes. That’s me.’

‘You have the same colors as Nomad!’

‘What? Are you repeating something? Is this something Tony said?’

‘Same colors! Same colors! But not his pecs!’

Steve blushed. That did sound like Tony.

‘God, I love those! I love those!’

‘What do you love?’

‘Winghead!’

Steve smiled, pleased, and left the workshop. Dinner was going to be great.

 

 

After his workshop adventure, Steve decided to do some paperwork he had been putting off - he had some expenses to report and some requests for Jarvis from the new members. He also wanted to take his mind off Tony for a little while, because if he didn’t, he was going to show up in his bedroom wearing the Nomad costume and hoping for the best. He was busy failing to do any paperwork when Tony burst into the room waving around a map like some demented pirate who had just found out his treasure had been dug up by somebody else.

‘Steve! I’ve figured it out! The location! Nomad!’

Steve lifted his head, confused. ‘Who? What? Somebody’s taken up the Nomad mantle?’

‘Oh, no, nobody feels as confident about their… Well, it’s the parrot. Remember I named him that?’

‘I still don’t get why.’

‘I told you - the color scheme is similar and… well, that’s it, really. It reminded me of you.’

Steve tilted his head. It was sweet, but he also hated that parrot.

‘Point is - it’s been trying to guide us to a specific location.’

‘Did he… tell you?’

‘In a manner of speaking. Turns out the catchphrases it uses aren’t random.’

Steve leaned back in his chair and spoke slowly, trying to get Tony to slow down a bit. ‘If they’re not random, what’s the pattern behind them?’

‘Every time a hero is involved in an incident near a certain, particular location, he repeats their catchphrase.’

‘How does he know where the incidents happen?’

‘Oh, I listen to the reports and I do paperwork when it’s in its cage.’

‘That’s a breach of security protocol,’ said Steve with his eyebrows raised. ‘You know those are confidential.’

‘Steve, it’s a parrot.’

‘Which by definition can talk. You need to be more careful.’

‘That’s not the point! That point is that we’ve found them! We can stage an attack.’

‘Do you have any more information on what they were doing?’

‘Breeding super-parrots. Captain Macawmerica or something.’

‘And to think that’s not even the stupidest stunt they’ve pulled.’

‘I wouldn’t even let it crack my Top Ten.’

They smiled at each other. Steve stood up. ‘And then, after that…’

‘Dinner,’ Tony said. ‘And… another trip to your bedroom.’

Steve leaned towards Tony and Tony leaned towards him, but the desk got in the way.

‘Mission first,’ Steve said, grimacing.

 

 

This time, instead of one of Tony’s fancy cars, they took a Quinjet. The whole team was there, ready for the fight but looking slightly weirded out because Nomad was in the back of the Quinjet, happily chirping and shrieking inside its cage. Tony had insisted on taking it with them. _Maybe it can give us some clues when we get there._ Steve wasn’t so sure, but he hadn’t wanted to argue with Tony about it.

‘Super-birds. Sounds like…’ Clint started.

‘Sounds about as silly as bird puns,’ warned Tony.

‘You know I wouldn’t!’

‘He’s right. But it sounds like fowlplay,’ Steve said, innocently.

‘Oh, Captain America, toucan play at that game.’

‘Doing that kind of manipulation should be ill-eagle, Iron Man.’

‘Oh, wow, now I want you two to stop,’ Clint said among the snickering of the rest of the team.

Tony laughed. ‘Fine, fine, Hawkeye, let’s not make this hackward. What should be our plan, Cap?’

‘I think we can wing it.’

‘Seriously, you two, stop it,’ Wanda said then, but she was smiling. She hadn’t been smiling much lately, so it was a welcome sight.

‘You’re robin us from all the fun!’

‘Yes, this is all for a good cawuse.’

Clint groaned again but before they could continue, they had reached the location. It had turned out to be a bunker in the middle of the forest in upstate New York, close to a small town. They landed a bit away from it and walked through the forest. It was dense, but there was enough sunlight that it only took them twenty minutes to find the bunker. It was covered by trees and vines, but if you knew what to look for, it was as obvious as a penguin in a McDonald’s.

AIM didn’t stand a chance.

First, Iron Man blasted open the doors - Steve never tired of that sight, of the way Tony would display the sheer power of the armor. Wanda lit up all the lights in the bunker at the same time. There was just one corridor that led to a big open space, but nothing too fancy. No lasers, no turrets and hopefully no traps. Just empty concrete.

Clint jumped in first without asking. There wasn’t much security - it was clear AIM thought superbirds were not a priority - and when fifteen minutes later he stood looking at the surrendering guards, Steve was almost disappointed it had been that easy.

‘Sorry you got so few people to punch, Cap,’ Tony said and patted his shoulder.

‘Well, that’s not…’

‘Steve. Please. I know you.’

‘They hardly put up a fight,’ he whined.

‘I know. In the old days, henchmen were made of sturdier stuff…’

Steve rolled his eyes. ‘Stop mocking me.’

‘I mock because I care.’

Steve smiled. ‘I know you do. Now go do your job.’

Tony saluted him and went to sit in front of the biggest computer - Tony had work to do, checking the files there for more information on AIM’s wildlife suppliers and the various projects they were working on. The computer looked… old. Everything about the place did - it was dusty and depressing, like a supervillain version of the DMV. While Tony worked, he’d gather information the analog way. Wanda had rounded up the AIM personnel they’d beaten and was keeping them immobilized with her powers - there were about fifteen guards, one office admin and half a dozen scientists. From the looks of it, it was barely a facility. Probably a place where AIM stuck its weirdos and failures and didn’t even bother to assign a janitor.

It should be easy, he thought, and stood in front of them with his hands on his hips.

‘We’re looking for information about a project related to birds.’

The AIM members looked at each other and then shrugged. Steve was always surprised about how expressive they could be while wearing beekeeper’s outfits. Almost as expressive as Iron Man’s faceplate.

‘We have none at the moment. There have been some… situations previously,’ one of the scientists finally said.

Steve had an inkling the situations could have very well starred Tippi Hedren but said nothing about it.

‘Nobody knows anything about some parrots?’

Two of the scientists glanced at each other. Steve walked to them and towered over them, frowning like only Captain America could.

‘What do you know?’ he asked them.

‘Parrots? That was… that was Bert’s project.’

‘Bert?’

‘Just Bert, I never asked for his surname because he’s a weird dude. Talks a lot about our plumiferous brethren inheriting the Earth when you just want to talk about the game.’

‘And you didn’t think it was suspicious?’

The scientist shrugged. ‘I work for AIM.’

‘Right. You should reconsider your career choices.’

‘Try finding a job with a Master’s in…’

Steve cut him off. ‘Where is Bret now?’

And then there was laughter from behind Steve. Right. Bert had arrived.

After the laughter, Steve heard the sounds of a hundred wings batting at the same time - he turned around to see a flock of about a dozen birds invading the bunker. They had weird helmets and lasers strapped to their backs. They also seemed in pain. Steve took the shield. Yes, the plan was silly, but the animals hadn’t done anything to deserve this. It was that kind of thoughtless cruelty for no good reason that always bothered Steve the most about AIM.

‘Avengers, let’s get this done. Let’s not hurt the birds.’

Bert, a small, slight man with a dark mop of greasy hair and wearing a hideous purple checker suit under a dirty lab coat, was still laughing. Steve could see a device on his hand. Probably how he controlled the parrots.

‘You’ll see! You’ll see! Parrots, they’re just as smart as humans! Parrots! They’ll beat you and then I’ll get my promotion!’

Steve didn’t want to make the animals suffer any more than was necessary, so without hesitation, he swung his arm and hit the device out of Bert’s hand with his shield. Bert screamed - Steve was sure it was the same hand he had hit last time, but he didn’t care. The shield fell to the ground next to Bert and Steve started walking towards him.

‘It’s over, Bert.’

Bert shook his head. ‘You won’t take me alive!’ he said and then before Steve could realize it, he had taken out something dark and metallic from his pocket.

‘Steve!’ he heard Tony scream and then a flurry of blue got in front of him.

‘Winghead! Winghead!’ Nomad said and dropped to the floor, hurt and whining with blood pooling under it.

Bert screamed in anguish. ‘Oh, no, not him! Not my greatest child!’

Without waiting for Steve’s signal, Clint grabbed Bert. ‘Like we said, this is over now.’

Meanwhile, Steve knelt and took the parrot in his arms. ‘You’re going to be okay, Nomad,’ he muttered. ‘We need to take care of it. Any vets here?’

One of the AIM scientists raised her hand shyly. ‘Hm, if I do, can you talk to the government for me? Get me a lesser sentence?’

Steve rolled his eyes. ‘You people are terrible, but yes.’

‘Hey, try having student loans and then we’ll talk, Captain Judgmerica,’ she said when Wanda let her go. ‘Put the close on the table. There’s a box with medical equipment. Can you…?’

Tony had already dropped it on the table next to the parrot. ‘If the parrot doesn’t make it, say goodbye to any kind of plea.’

His voice was steely and harsh enough that Steve knew Tony was worried. He cared about the bird, he really cared. Despite being an AIM henchwoman, the scientist was actually confident and competent. He wondered how she had gotten stuck there - she stopped the bleeding, the bullet having just grazed the parrot because Bert also had terrible… aim.

‘Here, done. But remember your promise.’

‘We will,’ Tony said, taking the parrot into his arms. It was covered in bandages, but it was still breathing. Steve would have to give it a treat later.

 

 

Tony had been hard at work - the workshop was free of food scraps, parrots, cold coffee, torn paper, and random mechanical pieces. It looked as radiant as Tony did. Even if Steve found him attractive all the time, resting always did wonders for Tony’s skin and smile, which were now as bright as they were supposed to be and his stubble was gone, facial hair back to its pristine condition.

‘SHIELD just got back to me. The birds have all been released in the Savage Land,’ Steve said, sitting down on a chair that just a few hours ago had been covered by bird feed and Tony’s notes. ‘One of them refused to have its lasers taken out, but they’ll be fine, even Nomad.’

‘I’m going to miss him,’ Tony said, putting away its cage in a closet. ‘The company was nice. Maybe I need to get a pet.’

Before they could be distracted by talks of Tony getting a Pomeranian or a cockatoo, Steve decided it was time to speak out. He was tired of being interrupted and the bird was gone, so it was as good a time as any.

‘There’s something I need to talk to you about.’

‘Hm. That sounds perfectly normal and not scary at all.’

‘It’s nothing serious, just something the parrot said.’

Tony leaned against one of the workshop benches and crossed his arms. His shirt rode up a little bit, letting Steve catch a glimpse of Tony’s skin and one of his hipbones. It was… tantalizing, to say the least.

‘… what did it repeat?’

‘Something about my pecs. I know I’m…’

‘It was inappropriate and embarrassing and I won’t do it again.’

Sometimes Tony was too quick to jump to conclusions. Steve shook his head - he would have to be clear and take it step by step.

‘It’s… why did you like my Nomad costume?’

Tony blushed crimson. ‘It had a nice design.’

‘It was tacky.’

‘It was sleek and fashionable! Like a Maserati.’

‘Tony.’

Tony put up his hands. ‘Fine. It was the cleavage. Happy now?’

‘Yes.’

‘Seriously?’ Tony said in between bouts of laughter. ‘That’s all it took? One compliment to your pecs? I never thought you were that easy!’

He wasn’t easy! Most people didn’t appreciate the Nomad costume enough and it was nice knowing that Tony liked him even when he made less than reasonable sartorial decisions. He smiled, finally sure that this was a good idea. Tony would like him, no matter what.

‘It’s not just that. The team has changed so much and yet… it feels like home. Because you’re here. I thought it was about time we stopped dancing around it.’

Tony’s laughter died down. ‘So you knew… Sometimes I thought you did, but I didn’t dare. Didn’t want to ruin this, but we won’t, right?’

‘I think we need to be a little bit more daring, don’t you think?’

‘Maybe,’ Tony said, fluttering his eyelashes.

‘Stop playing hard to get, Stark. Especially since you still owe me dinner. Are you up for that?’

‘You exchanged that one for a nap,’ Tony said before stepping away from the workbench.’

‘Oh. Then I’ll pay for it.’

‘You don’t have to do that. I’ll pay and you can pay me back later.’

‘Oh, really, how?’

Tony was in front of Steve now, looking up at Steve with his impossibly blue eyes and a mischievous grin. ‘I have a few ideas,’ he said and grabbed Steve’s shirt. Steve didn’t hesitate and kissed Tony.

He had expected fireworks but it was the opposite of an explosion - it was safe, steady and almost expected. Tony kissed him exactly like Steve thought he would. Sweet and intimate, like their conversations or their jokes. There was no grand gesture involved in this, just two friends finally being honest with themselves and daring to jump. Nothing had changed. He was still Steve and this was still Tony, his best friend.

Tony moaned against Steve’s mouth and that was enough to make his dick twitch inside his pants. ‘Hm, if we… don’t…’

‘No stopping now, Captain,’ Tony said in a low, husky voice. He rolled his hips against Steve’s and… Steve wasn’t the only one getting too into this. ‘Do you know how many times I hoped we’d go from chatting here to… this?’

‘A thousand?’

‘A million,’ Tony said and laughed when Steve grabbed him by his hips and sat him on the bench.

‘Touch yourself.’

Tony complied without comment, lowering his zipper slowly like the tease he was and then taking out his cock. Nothing Steve hadn’t seen before, but now it was hard and leaking. Tony wrapped his delicate, long fingers around it and Steve couldn’t help it - he went to his knees between Tony’s legs. He needed to suck on that dick, to feel Tony’s come down his throat.

‘Okay, this is…’

‘Do you want me to stop?’

‘Hell no,’ Tony said and grabbed a fistful of Steve’s hair. Steve’s moaned in appreciation - he had always liked it when a partner took charge and showed Steve how they wanted to be pleased. Tony shoved him down his cock unceremoniously and starting fucking Steve’s mouth. Steve willed his jaw open, made his whole body relax and let Tony set the pace. It was… so peaceful, letting go like this. Closing his eyes and focusing on the way Tony was pumping down his throat, on the way Tony was whining and panting and jerking. On the way, Tony’s come hit his face when he reached climax and the goofy smile on Tony’s face when he looked up.

‘Scale 1 to 10, how hard are you now, Steve?’

He opened his pants without one word and his cock sprung free.

‘Wow, that hard. Do you want some help with that?’

He grabbed one of Tony’s legs and tugged, making Tony fall and sprawl on top of him. ‘What do you think?’

Tony bit his neck and then took Steve’s cock into his hand. He started slow and steady, trying to make it last. But Steve knew it wouldn’t - he was too hard, too sensitive, too horny after so many years of waiting for this. Tony’s fingers cradled his balls and tugged a little bit and that was enough to set him off, coming all over his chest. He would have to wash that shirt.

‘That was…’

‘Embarrassing?’ Steve said with a groan.

‘Flattering! Do you like me that much?’

He put his arms around Tony and brought him closer.

‘And even more.’

 

 

**EPILOGUE**

The Savage Land was a wondrous place, he thought, this could be a new beginning for them. He could hear his people in the midst of the viridian, luscious jungle. They were happy, free at last and with nobody there to make them fight. They were going to be at peace and him, the Nomad, would protect that peace.

No. He couldn’t be the Nomad anymore. He had a home to protect now. He spread his wings and took flight.

His people were protected, for Captain Macawmerica was there and he’d make sure they were safe.


End file.
